Recovery: It's a God Thing
Sunday May 20, 2018
by Teresa McBean
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 33 and 34; Mark 11
I used to have a lot of secrets and didn’t even know it! Have you ever been in the midst of a conversation, and someone says something, and you have an “Aha” moment? That’s exactly what happened to me! I was attending a support group that focused on codependency issues (if you don’t know what that is all about, we have an Insight Journal all about it, Climbing Out of Codependency, that you can get on our website www.northstarcommunity.com) and the facilitator was talking about keeping secrets.
She explained to us that keeping secrets is “normal” in unhealthy families but not in healthy ones. This was a news flash to me! It changed my life. I can’t describe what happened, except to say that this one bit of new information opened my world and flooded it with a shining light. I began to remember things long forgotten. I recalled things that had happened to me as a child that I “managed” with silence. Once I began this journey, I gained new insights. I had hidden these events from myself and had failed to revisit them since childhood. My adult eyes saw them from a wildly different perspective than my “child” eyes had experienced them!
There was some pain involved. I had a relative who mistreated me. As a child, I felt “less than” and “not good enough.” Although I could acknowledge that this person was a “character,” I had never realized that this behavior was very inappropriate. Even now I resist typing “abusive.” There, I did it. It was abusive behavior. It was cruel. And this truth is very hard to admit. There are some repercussions for telling this truth. But, oh the consequences for keeping it secret is so much more destructive. The 12- step process taught me the value of having another person hear this information too. I don’t know why this is crucial to healing, but I can say that it has certainly been essential for me.
There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death. Proverbs 14:12 NIV
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17 NIV