In recent posts I have been talking about the role of shame in how we respond to difficult situations in ministry. What does all this have to do with our own work? Well, quite a lot. Here are a few ways to apply these principles:
- We are more than the worst problem we face today; there are small and wonderful ways we can love others, receive love, do good, find joy EVEN as we suffer and struggle with our issues.
- We have more relationships than just our troubling ones. We must tend to those loving relationships that bring us joy and give us a way to express joy with as much intention as we give our problem relationships.
- It is common, easy even, to resort to obsessive worry, blaming others, distractibility. Breathe.
- Take time to explore more than just the presenting issue. It’s easy to notice that we our binge eating has resulted in a failure to fit into skinny jeans. It’s obvious that if we want to get back in shape we will have to deal with the issue of creating a caloric deficit. But WHY are we bingeing? Binge eating is a problem and it is worthy work to deal with it. But what lies underneath the eating will also need to be addressed if sustainable change is one’s desired result.
As you consider your own stage of change, how can you find support to help you clarify your readiness, the primary issue, clarify your core values and implement a plan?